Im Sober and My Spouse Is Not Marriage and Sobriety

One of the hardest things to bear while your loved one is using is the undue burden it puts on you to run the household while your partner struggles with their disease. Nobody likes to think that addiction will happen to them or to their partner. I’ve found statistics that indicate a 20% increase in divorce rate for couples dealing with alcoholism in the marriage. The overall divorce rate in the United States is roughly 50%, and it makes sense that addiction to alcohol adds significant challenges for couples to overcome in order to stay together. No, I don’t know all the specifics of your relationship. Still, I know from experience that most, if not all, relationships that exist when one or both people are in active addiction are unhealthy. For 15 years, you established a relationship system that worked on some level, but it’s no longer working for either of you.

https://ecosoberhouse.com/ often very difficult for the partner to let go of the resentment, anger, and fear they’ve felt over the time their partner was using drugs and alcohol. Behavioral Couples Therapy approaches therapy for couples from the standpoint that a spouse can be a support to encourage the other to not drink.

“I’m sober Sheri. I quit drinking for you! What more do you want from me?”

It’s as if the person you married has disappeared, replaced by a monster named Addiction. Of course, studies have also shown that substance abuse and marital unhappiness can feed off one another, causing a cycle that will continue unless someone makes hard choices.

One is selfish, needy, vulnerable, and used to being given, while the other is over-responsible self-sufficient, and loves by providing. Sobriety topples these roles, and the partners realize they don’t even know how to talk to each other. Blame games start with every partner feelingsorry for themselves,shame, and guilt.

The non-addict partner

Quickly this turned into a passion to help others that led to study the treatment industry top to bottom. He learned state statutes and regulations, and studied counseling practices from several angles. This eventually led him back to school for a degree in psychology. It became Lyle’s passion to learn how to provide the best care possible and be able to treat people for the duration they needed as an individual, not the duration their bank account mandated.

When someone in marriage after sobriety takes positive steps to improve their life, they regain confidence in themselves. Doing this will simultaneously help their partner realize that they are committed to their recovery and marriage.